A Scribble and A Dream (8) - A (Very) Happy News

A (Very) Happy News

He is super thrilled.
He is "finally" moving to a better job, with a far better salary.
And, hopefully, a better superior as well.
His soon-to-be manager is their long-time-church friend after all.
He was even the bestman for his soon-to-be-manager's wedding.

Yup, it is very, very evident in her ears.
His voice is so clearly celebrating.
It's even trembling with excitement, full of happiness.
In her mind, she can picture him jumping in joy.

And that makes her want to jump in joy with him.
Unfortunately, it's currently office hour.
'No jumping in the office'
'Should such a sign existed in this office, it will be hilarious'
She giggled silently in her heart.

At least, her lips can't help but smile.
She wondered, is that how her voice was 3 years ago?
When she told her father about her acceptance in her current office?
'I think, I now understand how he felt that time'

And then, something new happened.
She get this overwhelming feeling.
It's so moving that she almost shed tears.
Is this how it feels to become genuinely joyful with others?

Or, maybe it's caused by other things?
She doesn't have this feeling with her other (girl) friends.
This is the first time ever for her.
Is it? Or, is it not?

A single voice chat, and a very short one at that.
A simple chat is enough to make her wonder.
'I think, maybe... But I'm not so sure...'

OK, off you go, back to work.

***

Catatan Harian Sang Burung Gagak - Dalam Sebuah Dunia

DALAM SEBUAH DUNIA

Aku melihat air matamu
Dan kamu melihat air mataku
Dalam sebuah dunia
Yang sudah tiada saling percaya

Aku curiga padamu
Dan kau curiga padaku
Dalam sebuah dunia
Di mana kebencian adalah makanan utama

Dalam sebuah dunia
Di mana empati sudah dicampakkan
Kata “mendengar” sudah dihapuskan
Kata “renungkan” dan “ujilah” dikuburkan

Dalam sebuah dunia
Di mana panggung sandiwara merajalela
Konspirasi menjadi pola pikir utama
Semua saling adu teriak menjadi yang paling pertama

Di sini, aku dan kamu, ya, kita semua
Berdiri dengan seribu ucapan yang tak terkatakan

(Catatan harian sang Burung Gagak, 13/12/2016)

Catatan Harian Sang Burung Gagak - Susu dan Nila

SUSU DAN NILA

Seekor burung gagak
Hinggap di atas dahan pohon tegak
Paruhnya dibuka, matanya membelalak
Berkaok-kaok dengan suaranya parau

“Dengarlah, dengarlah hai kawanku!
Ini suaraku, yang sebentar lagi akan hilang terbawa waktu!
Dengarlah, dengarlah walau kau tak setuju!
Karena setelah ini, lupakan saja kata-kataku!

Kata-kata mutiara jaman dahulu:
Karena nila setitik, rusak susu sebelanga
Lihatlah, ia telah meneteskan nila dalam susu kita!
Mari kita lupakan semua usaha kerja kerasnya!
Nila itu telah menghapuskan semua jasa-jasanya!

Katakanlah, katakanlah!
Apakah nila itu?
Kau sendiri juga tahu
Apa seruan massa pada hari Jumat yang lalu.

Ingatlah, ingatlah!
Inilah nila yang teramat besarnya
Sehingga perlu setaralah hukumannya
Kalau perlu melebihi para pendahulunya
Yang tampaknya memberikan susu murni kepada kita

Apakah mereka memberi kita susu tanpa nila?
Aku tak tahu, dan generasiku kadang sudah lelah mencari tahu
Mungkin selama ini kita minum nila
Sehingga nila terasa susu, dan susu terasa nila

Apa yang sebelumnya telah kita minum dengan rela,
Itu susukah? Nilakah?
Karena kata tiga huruf itu, KKN, sudah menjadi biasa
Mereka penjamin kehidupan si pelakunya
Kita sudah acuh dan kebal padanya

Walau mungkin sang tiga huruf
akan jadi nila bagi generasi penerus bangsa
Selama hidup pelakunya aman tenteram, itulah susu bagi mereka!

Jangan! Jangan kau pilih!
Ia yang telah meneteskan setetes cairan mirip nila
Sehingga tampak merusak susu sebelanga
Ia sudah tak pantas dipercaya lagi!

Lupakan, lupakan!
Semua jerih payah, elusan dada, air mata, gelisah dan doanya bagi kita!
Lupakan saja!

Karena kita ini para orang egois, dan bahkan aku juga
Bangsa kita belum siap minum susu
Dan mungkin harus kembali belajar dari nila rasa susu.

Kau, ya kau! Kau yang akan kami pilih!
Ingatlah dan jangan pernah lupakan
Bahwa nila setitik akan merusakkan susu sebelanga!"

Seekor burung gagak
Telah lelah berkaok
Pergi terbang mencari makan siangnya
Seekor cacing untuk mengisi perutnya

(Dikaokkan oleh Sang Burung Gagak, 7 November 2016)

- Postingan ini adalah sesuai postingan asli si Gagak di Facebook -

A Scribble and A Dream (7) - A Lady in Wondering, in Waiting

CHAPTER 7

A Lady in Wondering, in Waiting

*klak*

Earphone diletakkannya di atas meja.
Ia menghela napas panjang
Menengadah, menatap langit-langit kantornya.

'Kisah cintaku, kenapa begini?'
'Isi hatiku, kenapa seperti ini?'

Semenjak ia menyadari rasa
Yang perlahan mulai bergemuruh dalam hatinya
Setiap kali ia memikirkan tentang dia
Yang lambat laun mulai menarik perhatiannya

Ya, kupu-kupu mulai berputar dalam perutnya
Setiap kali ia mengingat wajahnya
Dan setiap kali ia melihatnya
Hatinya sontak bersukacita

Walau saat berjalan
Ia di ujung kiri, dan dia di ujung kanan
Ia tidak berkeberatan, sama sekali tidak
Cukuplah ada memori bersamanya

Kadang, kesal melanda
Ingin rasanya ia teriakkan di puncak gunung sana,
'Ijinkan aku kenal kau lebih jauh, sedikit saja!'
Akankah tepukannya tiada bersambut, tak bersuara?

Sang kakak berkata,
"Apa kau sudah berserah?"
'Mungkin belum,' batinnya
'Aku hanya berpikir untuk menyerah.'

"Tapi berserah beda dengan menyerah."
'Apa berserah sama dengan pasrah?'
'Tuhan, apa aku harus diam saja?'
'Tuhan, diam menanti itu sulit'

'Aku takut mendapat jawaban "Tidak" dariMu.'

Ia menatap kembali layar laptopnya.
Mari, sudah saatnya kembali bekerja.

Rasa Hati

Tak terasa sekian waktu t'lah berlalu
Tak terasa minggu-minggu t'lah lewat
Sejak pertama ku bertemu denganmu
Pada waktu Minggu siang itu

Kulalui bersama semua
Bercengkrama dengan kawan kita
Dan lambat laun, ku mencoba untuk
Belajar lebih kenal dirimu

Semua tawamu dan candamu
Semua kisahmu dan galaumu
Aku perlahan mulai menantikannya

Semua senyummu dan kabarmu
Saat berjumpa denganmu
Aku bahagia hanya memikirkannya

Dan ku bertanya, apakah artinya ini?
Apa maksud hatiku, aku pun tak tahu
Mereka bilang, jika cinta, jantung kan berdebar
Namun degupku tetap biasa saja

Apa ini cinta? Sungguh aku tak mengerti
Pikirku berkata, "Mungkin bukan? Namun..."
Namun yang kutahu, hanya melihat dirimu
Sanggup membuat senyumku merekah

Dan aku memilih diam, tak b'rani berharap
Ku tak mau bebani dirimu
Asal kau bisa tetap menjadi temanku, cukuplah
Lebih baik kupandang kau dari jauh saja

Jika kelak, kau temukan seorang yang terbaik bagimu
Aku kan berdoa untuk kau dan dia
Semoga aku pun menemukan yang terbaik bagiku
Suatu hari kelak, sesuai waktu-Nya

A Scribble and A Dream (6) - A Reunion

CHAPTER 6

A Reunion

She glanced at the calendar. September 3, 2016.

Her mind wandered back to a Whatsapp chat message she received 2 months prior.

"Let's meet up! And invite others too..."

Somehow it ended up with her being appointed as the unofficial organizer for the event, unknowingly and involuntarily.

Well, yeah, part of it is also caused by her exasperation that no one seems to take efforts to realize this plan.

She checked her high school group chat again.

9 confirmed persons, including her.

After all those dissenting opinions with no concrete alternative, silent chat reads and "yeah whatever" replies to the proposed place and time.

Oh well, let's get going...

In overall, it was a decent reunion.

The place was unpredictably dim and hot during the weekends, different from how it was during the weekdays.

'No more reunion here. The atmosphere is not enough.'

The food? Well, within expectation, considering the price and the full belly of her friends afterwards.

At least, that was a relief and a good consolation for the organizer. :-)

The conversation itself is quite pleasant.

Some of the more chatty friends put an effort to bring up some topics, so the awkward silent moments are minimized.

Two things were swirling in her mind.

How glad she was to see that all of those noisy high school girls and boys have grown up to be such mature, good mannered and polite young men and ladies. Now this is what you should call, "Cool!".

At least, that was how she saw it.

And yet, here she saw another proof that what we know as children, all those success stories our parents and teachers told us about this and that career, is perhaps nothing but a dream, a wish, and an unrealistic imagination.

In front of her was the wife of a young doctor couple that has come to a conclusion that their career might not be sufficient to finance their family in the future. Now, who is it that told us youngsters, that the life of a doctor is bright and secure?

Also, her two non-certified architect friends are struggling to earn more money by taking freelance projects, asking another certified architect to sign the design.

Lastly, a jobless guy whose biggest talent is possibly in art. Well, this country provides no decent living for artists, so he would have to try to make it in other countries. Seems he doesn't have the funds to do so...

Seems like the whole scene is screaming to her, "See? Passions are only for day-dreamers! If you want to survive, both now and in the future, don't you dare follow your passion..."

It's 3 p.m. She and her friends bid goodbye to each other with a smile and a wave.

Well, maybe some other time, they can meet again.

And she promised silently in her heart, that she will never be the organizer again.

She hurriedly called a taxi home. Another to do list was waiting.

A Scribble and A Dream (5) - A Song

CHAPTER 5

A Song

"At Gwanghamun"...

The singer has exactly the same age as she is.

In fact, this boy's (or man's) birthday is just a day after her own birthday.

When she was a younger, more innocent teenager, she used to silently take pride in that unimportant, silly fact only she herself knew.

She loves his songs very, very much.

And yet, she has promised herself not to attend any of his rare concerts in her country. Logically, it's just... not worth her time and money, that is ought to be saved and used properly.

She has always restrained herself not to be a fanatic fans of his, and she has promised herself that she will never be.

After all, he is someone from a faraway country, someone who has been striving so hard to achieve his dreams to become a great singer and entertainer, and is getting paid well for his very, very long and (surely) painful effort from early adolesence.

But still...

His songs, his sweet and powerful singing voice that never fails to mesmerize her, fills her melancholic heart.

Oneul babocheoreom

Geu jarie seo inneun geoya 🎶

She sighs, and silently, voicelessly singing the melodies along, enjoying words she doesn't understand.

"What about me?" she wondered.

Same age, yet so different...

Here she is, doing something that she should do...

There he is, doing something that he must do, his life-long dream...

Does he love doing what he is doing?

What would happen if I had taken a different path?

What would happen if I had let myself took the same path as his?

She imagines herself making music alongside him, then shakes her head.

Nah, don't be silly, ahaha...

A shaky, sharp voice, an ordinary piano playing, and a not-so-popular musical preference.

A complete amateur...

It definitely wouldn't sell, what else can be done?

She glances a bit, sighs one more time, and continued typing on the screen in front of her.

Working day is almost over...

***

A Scribble and A Dream (4) - A Usual Day

CHAPTER 4

A Usual Day

A glass door, with an ID Card lock.

The girl lifted her yellow nametag.

Beep! Click!

She walks in, and take a look around.

Not many has arrived, it seems.

"Good morning..."

A greeting from a colleague.

"Good morning..."

She nods, and smiles politely.

There it is, a small cubicle, filled with papers, stationeries, and a makeshift toy display.

Hoping, that way, the desk will be less boring, less dull.

She pulled her chair out, and stared for a while to the pile of documents on her workspace.

Yes, 'tis another day, where tasks and calls awaits...

Just like every other day.

***

A Scribble and A Dream (3) - A Walk

CHAPTER 3

A Walk

A traffic light.

An intersection.

Cars passing by, along with some honks.

The girl turned her head over and glanced across the street.

How many times has she done this?

Ah, no need to count, just a waste of time anyway.

Look, the light has turned green.

Her leg starts moving, making steady steps towards the brown, old building.

In the midst of it, she looked up, high to the skies.

For her, life has always been like this.

How she longs for something new, something exciting!

Something that, perhaps, can make her heart flutter with great thrill and passion.

Something that she is willing to do with great gladness in the heart.

She inhales the polluted town air, and lets out a deep sigh.

Her steps quicken, lest the traffice light turns red again.

***

A Scribble and A Dream (2) - A Morning

CHAPTER 2

A Morning

The girl glanced again to the clock beside her bed.

She slowly opened her cozy blanket, and stepped to the bed beside hers.

"Hey, wake up..."

"Uhhmmmm..."

Her little sister moved a bit, before sinking herself deeper into her own blanket.

"This little..."

She can't help but playfully pinch the nose of the younger girl in front of her.

"Hey, wake up, you said you're coming with me to your campus..."

Seeing her sister turned once more to face the wall, she sighed, and stepped away.

Her sister will wake up in time sooner or later, no need to worry.

She has to get ready, otherwise...

The sound of the morning kitchen greets her, with the voice of her mum humming and chopping heard in the background.

She entered the bath and start preparing.

***

A Scribble and A Dream (1) - A Dream

CHAPTER 1

A Dream

The girl sits quietly and solemnly.

Her eyes fixed on the piano in front of her.

Her arms lifted, her fingers on the white and black ebony keys.

One note.

Two notes, then another comes.

Next, a chord from the low tones, followed by a mesmerizing, twinkling scale on the high tones.

In a matter of seconds, a harmonious, sweet, enchanting, but lonely melody is heard in the air.

Painting the scenes, melting hearts, enveloping souls.

She closed her eyes, listening to the song coming out from the piano.

Ah! How beautiful! Just me and the colours of music...

If only...

She opened her eyes, to the scenery of the white ceiling in her room.

It's already 7 in the morning, and it's Monday.

Working day.

***

Beruntungkah Aku - And Can It Be That I Should Gain?

“Sebab kamu tahu, bahwa kamu telah ditebus dari cara hidupmu yang sia-sia yang kamu warisi dari nenek moyangmu itu bukan dengan barang yang fana, bukan pula dengan perak atau emas, melainkan dengan darah yang mahal, yaitu darah Kristus yang sama seperti darah anak domba yang tak bernoda dan tak bercacat.” 1 Petrus 1: 18-19

Charles Wesley, penulis himne ini merupakan seorang yang sedari muda sangat disiplin dalam melatih kehidupan religiusnya. Dia aktif dalam organisasi religius di kampusnya, Oxford University, dan pergi melayani menjadi misionaris bagi orang Amerika asli. Namun, ia tidak merasakan adanya damai atau pun sukacita dalam hati maupun hidupnya. Setelah beberapa waktu, ia kembali ke London, dan ketika itu ia bertemu dengan sekelompok Moravians di Aula Aldersgate dan menyadari bahwa “keselamatan hanyalah melalui iman”. Pada 21 Mei 1783, ia menulis dalam jurnalnya, “Pada tengah malam ini, ku serahkan diriku kepada Kristus.”

Dua hari kemudian, dalam semangat dan sukacita yang melimpah, Charles menuliskan himne barunya  yang menceritakan perubahan hidupnya. Awalnya ia tidak yakin apakah harus menyelesaikan himne ini. Ia berpikir, apakah termasuk meninggikan diri ia kalau membicarakan pengalaman pribadi? Namun ia berdoa agar Tuhan menuntunnya menyelesaikan himne ini, sehingga meskipun ia menceritakan pengalamannya, tapi juga dapat mewakili pengalaman dari jutaan orang yang beriman pada Tuhan Yesus Kristus.

Diterjemahkan secara bebas dari:

Amazing Grace: 366 Inspiring Hymn Stories for Daily Devotions

oleh Kenneth W. Osbeck

dan

The Complete Book of Hymns

oleh William J. Petersen & Ardythe Petersen

Pada Salib - Alas, And Did My Savior Bleed? (At The Cross)

Bahasa Indonesia:

Bahasa Inggris:

Yesaya 53:4-6, “Tetapi sesungguhnya, penyakit kitalah yang ditanggungnya, dan kesengsaraan kita yang dipikulnya, padahal kita mengira dia kena tulah, dipukul dan ditindas Allah. Tetapi dia tertikam oleh karena pemberontakan kita, dia diremukkan oleh karena kejahatan kita; ganjaran yang mendatangkan keselamatan bagi kita ditimpakan kepadanya, dan oleh bilur-bilurnya kita menjadi sembuh. Kita sekalian sesat seperti domba, masing-masing kita mengambil jalannya sendiri, tetapi TUHAN telah menimpakan kepadanya kejahatan kita sekalian.”

Himne yang bait utamanya ditulis oleh Isaac Watts, dan refrainnya ditulis oleh Ralph Hudson ini, telah menyentuh hati berjuta-juta orang selama berabad-abad. Setelah menggambarkan kontras yang sangat besar antara kematian dan pengorbanan sang Pencipta yang maha kuasa dan ketidaklayakan makhluk ciptaan yang berdosa,ia menyimpulkannya dengan sebuah penyerahan, “Here Lord, I give myself away, ‘tis all that I can do”.

Seorang pria menulis kepada mantan guru Sekolah Minggunya: “Anda ingat himne ‘Alas, and did my Savior bleed?’ Aku menganggapnya sebagai sampah, namun kalimat-kalimat himne itu mengikutiku kemanapun seperti detektif. Aku tidak bisa lari dari pertanyaan ‘Was it for crimes that I have done?’ Karena itulah, akhirnya aku menyerahkan hidupku kepada-Nya.”

Selain itu, ada seorang wanita buta berusia 30 tahun yang mendengar sebuah paduan suara KKR menyanyikan himne yang sederhana ini. Bait demi bait menggerakkan hatinya, namun saat paduan suara menyanyikan “Here, Lord, I give myself away”, ia pun juga menyerahkan hidupnya kepada Tuhan. Saat ia melakukannya, ia mengatakan bahwa ‘jiwanya dipenuhi cahaya dari surga’. Wanita tersebut adalah Fanny Crosby, yang kemudian menjadi penulis dari ratusan lagu himne gospel.

Diterjemahkan secara bebas dari:

The Complete Book of Hymns

oleh William J. Petersen & Ardythe Petersen